Charming Juice
by BIGMAMA1986
Summary: Dave Johnson, Alissa's husband was dead, he had left 3 people in the hospital and now Juice was being questioned over his murder. Can Alissa come back from this? her physical wounds will heal but will her emotional ones?. Juice adores Alissa and she adores him, but will her new found friendship put a strain on their relationship? find out in the next edition of the Charming Saga
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

I woke up in hospital feeling like I had been hit by a bus, I turned my head slightly to see Jackson asleep in the chair.

"Jax" I said. He opened his eyes and looked at me. "welcome back sleepy head" he smiled and came over and sat on the bed. "how you feeling?" he asked grabbing my hand.

"Like I've been ran over" I sighed.

"press this button, Tara said it releases the pain meds into your system" he passed me the remote and I pressed it loads of times.

"wheres Juice?" I asked.

"he's been took for questioning" he said, "that's why I'm here, he didn't want you to come round alone."

"he was protecting me" I said

"don't worry darlin', it's just routine once you tell them what happened it will be fine" he said.

I didn't say anything for awhile and then I remembered Half Sack and Rat boy.

"oh my god, Rat boy and Sack" I said trying to sit up.

"hey calm down Rat boy is fine, Just a concussion, few cuts and bruises" he said

"what about Sack I tried to put pressure on it but he found me" I said beginning to cry.

"I'm not going to lie to you he's in a bad way, he's spleen was ruptured they're operating on him now" he said.

I sobbed then "It's all my fault, if I hadn't have stayed they wouldn't have had to protect me"

"hey, we all wanted you to stay, they offered to protect you they think the world of you, these guys have never had anyone care for them like you do. The amount of times you have gone out your way to help them is untrue, believe me they love you and would do anything for you"

Just then Tara came in, Jax gave her a kiss.

"how you feeling" she asked touching my shoulder.

"How's Kip?" I asked using Half sacks other nickname.

"the surgery went well they were able to repair he's spleen. He's in recovery now and stable" she smiled.

"Oh thank god" I said squeezing Jax's hand.

"I've got a few thing's to tell you in private" she said.

"no Jax can stay" I said.

"are you sure?, they're personal"

"no I want him to stay, if that's okay?" I asked him.

"course darlin'" he said squeezing my hand.

"okay well we ran some tests you have concussion and unfortunately I'm sorry to say you lost the baby" she said.

"what?" I asked frowning.

"it's probably due to the trauma"

"what are you on about baby? I can't have children they told me in Vegas"

"well I can a sure you you were pregnant only a few weeks gone" she said. I clasped my hand to my mouth as tears streamed down my face. "so now what?" I asked "can I conceive now or what?"

"well by the looks of it you can, but we will have to run tests when you've healed, you have quite server grazing and bruising in your vagina as if something..." she looked at Jax.

"he raped me with the rifle" I sobbed. Jax grabbed me and held me.

"I'm so sorry for what he did to you baby" he said kissing my head.

"I want to get it all said and out the way, I'm sorry" Tara said

"go a head" I said wiping my eyes.

"we did a rape kit whilst you were sedated as Juice is your next of kin on your insurance forms he gave the okay to do that" she said.

"that's fine I'm glad you did it whilst I was out of it"

"we took swabs for STD's and we have also checked you for aids, if it comes back clear you will have to be re-tested in a few months time" she said. " we have given you antibiotics incase you do have any sexually transmitted diseases, which you should continue to take when you go home. We would like to keep you in for observation but apart from that you are physically just battered and bruised, its the mental wounds I'm worried about"

"I'm not seeing a shrink" I snapped.

"there are support groups I will give you the details when you are discharged." she said.

She looked at the door "the police want to speak to you, but I can hold them off a while longer if you want?" she said

"no lets get it over and done with" I exhaled deeply. " would you mind staying?" I said to Jax.

"course darlin'" he said kissing my hand.

"you don't mind do you?" I asked Tara.

"no I prefer him to stay with you until Juice gets back, you mean a lot to me Liss and I know he will look after you" she said kissing my cheek.

"listen, before they come in you need to tell them that he had Kip's gun, we wiped your prints and placed it in his hand" Jax said as Tara left.

"why?" I asked.

"because he wasn't armed and you were holding the gun, they will send Juice down if we tell them that, just trust me darlin'" he replied.

"okay, I get you" I said.

They had sent Unser and a female officer to take my statement, as Unser was a friend of the club and I knew him well.

It took an hour to go through it all and then revisit things I had forgotten, they wanted to know why I had never reported the abuse in Las Vegas.

"so you trying to say she bought this on herself?" Jax asked getting mad.

"Not at all we just have to ask these questions." Unser said " if anything comes of it!"

"what is that supposed to mean?" Jax said standing up and letting go of my hand.

" well Mr Ortiz did shoot him from behind" the female officer said.

"have you seen the state Liss is in? Have you seen the guy lay in recovery because he was stabbed by that sick mother fucker?" Jax shouted.

"calm down son, it's not going to come to anything, once we process Alissa's and Rat boy's statements and spoke to Kip when he comes round I'm sure Juice will be released." Unser said.

"there's hospital records of my abuse and I told them exactly who did it I just never pressed charges" I said. " I told you about the phone call you made a note of it you told me, isn't that good enough?"

"like I said nothing will probably come of it" Unser said.

I was beside myself when they left and Jax held me tight "I promise you he will be out soon babe, we have all given statements and once csi have processed everything they will see. I've got Lowen on it believe me. Our stories are all straight, Tara is going to tell me when Kip comes round and hold the police off until we have spoke to him." he said.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"You hungry?" Jax asked. It was past lunch and I refused the horrible hospital food.

"starving" I smiled.

"How about I go get us some proper food, get one of the girls to grab somethings for you I'll send Lyla or Cherry, they can't get in to the apartment yet, it's still a crime scene" he said.

"yes please I've got no money on me though" I said.

"don't worry I got this" he smiled. "I'm going to get someone to come and sit with you"

"thanks Jax, for everything"

"don't sweat it girl" he said. He kissed me on the brow and left. A few minutes later Chibs walked in, "my baby girl" he said rubbing my head and kissing me on the brow. "how you feeling?"

"like utter shit, but re leaved at the same time" I sighed " I just need to see Juice"

"he will be released soon enough" he said taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

"hopefully" I smiled.

" when can you go home?" he asked.

"in the morning, they want to keep me in for observation, nothing too bad just concussion, stitches"

"I know you don't want to bring it all up but is everything okay down there, I only ask because there was a lot of blood when we found you and I worry about you like you were my own daughter" he said.

" I was pregnant and what he did caused me to miscarry,but please keep it to yourself, obviously Juice doesn't know yet" I said welling up.

"I didn't even know you were pregnant" Chibs said with tears in his eyes.

"neither did I, they told me after I miscarried the last time I wouldn't be able to have children, and now I've found out this I have to o through it all again to probably told the same because he's caused more damage to me"

" I'm so sorry Liss baby, I wish to god I could bring that sick son of a bitch back just to kill him myself" he said.

We sat in silence for awhile, with him just holding my hand. I must of nodded off because I was startled by Jax coming back in holding a bag, Iced tea and food bag from the diner.

"I got your fave" he smiled "you are a legend" I said. Chibs and Jax helped me to the bathroom, as I couldn't walk because of the cuts on my feet. The hospital gown did nothing for my modesty but after last night they had seen it all before. Jax handed me the bag, Inside were brand new PJ's, pants, pads, bed socks, slippers, dressing gown and toiletries. I started to cry when I peed, the pain was horrendous and I nearly threw up. I took the hospital pad off, which was soaked with blood I threw it in the bin with the vile netted pants they had put on me whilst I was out of it. I put on my new pants and a pad. I managed to stand up after I put the socks on to pull my new Pj's on. I looked in the Mirror, and what I saw starring back made me cry even more.

"you okay?" Jax asked tapping the door.

"yeah, just saw myself in the mirror for the first time" I snorted.

I washed my face to get the blood off and gave my body a quick wash, spraying myself so I didn't smell for my visitors and brushed my teeth. My hair was caked in blood so I scraped it back as I couldn't wash it for a while. Finally I put my dressing gown on and my new slippers.

"you need any help?" Jax called.

I opened the door, they both looked at me. "you feel better?" Chibs asked.

"I need the nurse to come and give me more pain relief" I said as they had taken the drip off me a few hours earlier but the cannula was still in my arm.

Jax got up and pressed the buzzer for me, whilst Chibs helped me into bed.

After I had something for the pain I sat an ate my double bacon cheese burger, it tasted like heaven and I felt much better.

I fell asleep shortly after, I had a nightmare that Dave came to the hotel and slit my throat. I shot up in a panic. I was sweating and breathing heavily, the room was in darkness and there was a dark figure on the chair in the corner.

I let out a scream, the figure got up and rushed towards me "GET AWAY FROM ME!" I screamed, kicking out at them.

"hey, hey calm down its me" Juice said. I saw his face from the light coming from the corridor. I flung my arms around him and sobbed, harder than I had ever sobbed before.

It was ages before we let each other go, I never wanted to let him go.

I scooted over on the bed and let him lie next to me.

"What happened?" I asked

"I'm out on bail, pending further investigation, but I'll be okay babe" he said taking my hand.

"good" I said grabbing his hand and locking fingers.

"I don't care about that anyway baby, I want to know what the doctors have said and when I can take you home" he said

"Juice I want to tell you everything but I don't want you to lose your shit, I will tell you exactly what he did to me, I don't want to have any secrets from you I just want to get it all out so we can deal with it together, Okay?"

"I can't promise I won't get mad but I will always be here for you Alissa, always" he said


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

I told Juice everything that had happened the previous night, he cried through most of it.

"so that's why there was so much blood?, you know down there?" he asked wiping the tears from he's cheeks.

"I don't know how to tell you this, I honestly didn't know and I thought it could never happen"

"just tell me" He said.

"I was pregnant and I miscarried" I said "I was only a few weeks gone, I literally must have got pregnant the first time we had sex, but I was told I couldn't get pregnant"

Juice looked at me and I saw him swallow hard. "you were pregnant with my baby?, and because of him you lost it?" he said slowly.

"yes Tara told me when I came round" I said.

Juice looked evil, he was grinding his teeth and I could see that he was mad.

"I'm sorry babe I honestly didn't know I thought I couldn't have any"

"you think I'm mad about that?" he said angrily standing up.

"I don't know anymore" I began to cry then.

"I'm mad because that cunt took our baby away from us, I'm mad that I let him die so quickly, I should have had him raped and butchered a slow painful death" Juice had a crazed look in his eye, he put his cut on and his boots.

"what are you doing?" I asked "where are you going?" he completely ignored me and marched off out the door.

I grabbed my phone and called Juice but he's phone was off, so I called Jax.

"what's up?" he answered.

"I just told Juice about the baby and he's flipped gone off and I'm worried he's going to do something mad, and he wouldn't even speak to me, I'm worried its all been too much for him"

"listen I'll send someone to find him and I'll come to you" he said.

"Jax I love him I can't be with out him."

"I know darlin'" he replied. "I'll see you in a few"

I called the nurse to give me more pain meds, and used the bathroom. Jax arrived and I burst into tears.

"hey calm down Liss, he just needs to let off some steam he's not mad at you he's mad because of what that prick did to you" he said hugging me.

"I wanna go home" I cried.

"you can't it's still locked off" he said.

"well get me in a motel then I just need to get out of here" I said.

"let me call Opie you can stay at he's because he's always at Lyla's. Then I'll go speak to the doc" he said.

He went off for a while so I tried calling Juice, but he wasn't answering. Jax came back in with Tara and the discharge papers.

Half an hour later I was sat beside Opie in his truck on the way to his house. "thanks for this Ope" I said.

"No need to thank me babe, stay as long as you need to" he said. "you need me to stay with you?"

"no I'm fine I've got all my meds, I just want a bath and to get in bed, It feels like the middle of the night and it's 9.30" I said.

"you've had a rough few days" he said.

So Opie got me settled and left me a gun to protect myself, I thanked him and locked the door when he left. I had a long soak in the bath, when I first got in it hurt like hell, but it soothed me a lot.

I got dressed and got in bed. I tried calling Juice one more time bit it went straight to voicemail, so I decided to text him.

 **I love you baby, I know its been tough but I truly do love you and I want us to be happy together after its all settled down. Please don't do anything stupid just come and be with me. I discharged myself and I'm at Ope's alone. Plz come and be with me Liss xxxx**

It took me ages to fall asleep, I had a nightmare again and woke up at 2am in a panic. Tara had prescribed me Valium for panic attacks so I got out of bed and went to the kitchen pouring myself a glass of water in the dark. I heard a rattling noise coming from the front door, It burst open and I jumped a mile dropping the glass and smashing it.

The light went on and stood there was Juice, I felt so relieved, but I didn't know what to do. Should I hug him? Or should I just wait to see what he did?. We stood in silence starring at each other for what seemed like an eternity.

"you mean what you said in the text?" he asked.

"course I mean it I wouldn't say it if I didn't" I said.

He walked over and grabbed both my hands. "I'm sorry I walked out on you, but I needed to clear my head, everything just got on top of me and I can't bare to see my baby hurting" he said " I don't want to talk about it now, but believe me I'm gutted about the baby and I'm gutted that you would think I was more bothered about you being pregnant. I know we haven't been together that long but I would have been happy to have one with you"

"it's okay" I grabbed his arms and put them around my waist, then wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I love you and we will get past this together" he said, then kissed me. "lets go to bed".

The next few day's were hard and full of emotion. Jax gave Juice a few days off and told him not to bother with the club. I was told to take as much time as I needed before coming back to work.

The investigation was dropped and so was Juice's bail. We were allowed to go back to the apartment so we headed over there, I didn't think anything of it until I walked in the door. There was a pool of blood by the door and all up the door frame and then I saw the sofa and all the blood. I felt my legs give way, next thing I was on the floor sobbing with Juice holding me. He picked me up and practically carried me down the stairs and put me back in the car.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

I don't remember Juice getting in the car or what he said to me, I was conscious but my mind was zoned out. The next thing I remembered was being in the hospital with Tara giving me a Valium shot. I was put in a side room until I calmed down.

"we're going to the cabin for a few day's" Juice said " just me and you nobody to disturb us, we need to get through this, if I have to get a new apartment I will baby"

I didn't acknowledge him, I was too upset, "do you want to?" he asked.

"I need to see Kip" I croaked, I hadn't even seen him to thank him for risking his life to save me.

"if I take you to see him will you please come to the cabin?" he asked. I nodded in agreement.

Juice walked me to Kips room.

"I need to do this alone" I said.

"okay babe, I'll be right outside" he said.

I exhaled deeply before entering the room, when Sack saw me he's eye's lit up and he had a huge grin on his face. Cherry was sat there with him. "hey" she smiled, but I didn't react.

"could you go grab us a drink?" Kip asked.

"what?" she snapped.

"just go get us a drink" he repeated "please".

She got up in a huff and stormed out, " don't mind her, she's not left my side since I got here, she's doing my head in I need a break" he laughed.

I walked over to the bed and grabbed his hand as I began to cry.

"what you crying for?" he smiled.

"because look at you, it's my fault" I said.

"are you mental?" he laughed "It's not your fault, I chose to guard the house, it's just one of them things"

"you nearly died, it's not funny" I sniffed.

"In 4-6 weeks I'll be fully recovered don't stress" he said rubbing my arm.

I hugged him and just cried, "so come on tell me what happened?" he said after I had composed myself.

"we've only just been able to go back in the house, and it's like a house of horrors, it gave me a panic attack"

"you have to calm down now, he's gone he ain't never going to hurt you again" he said.

"we're going to the cabin for a few days clear our heads" I smiled.

"yeah, just some you and Juice time" he smiled.

"I love him, I really do but I'm worried its not going to work out for us. How can it after all whats happened?" I said.

"if its meant to be its meant to be just chill" he smiled.

"why do you always make me see things clearer?" I asked.

"god knows, I talk a load of shit usually except when I'm with you" he laughed.

"best mates that's why?" I smiled.

"there's my Lissie" he smiled too, "and that beautiful smile"

I grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "when you breaking out of this joint?" I asked.

"tomorrow" he said.

"that's good" I smiled "when will you be back at work?" I asked.

"not sure it takes about 6 weeks to heal properly,but I'll be able to do a few things"

"well what ever you need, rent money, food?, just let me know" I said.

"Jax and Juice already said they will sort it" he said.

"I love you" I said giving him a hug "love you too babe" he replied.

Just then Cherry walked through the door in a huff with 2 coffees, which she didn't offer me one.

"You need to get some rest" Cherry said rolling her eyes, not directly at me but blatantly about me.

"all I've done is fucking rest" Kip said sharply.

"I'm leaving anyway, Juice and I have to get to the cabin" I said, I wasn't arsed with Cherry's bullshit I had enough problems to deal with. I gave Kip a hug "take care" I said.

"you too" Kip replied.

"bye Cherry" I said as I walked out the door.

Juice was sat on the chair a little way up the corridor.

"you done?" he asked.

"yes baby, lets go" I said grabbing his hand.

We sat in silence for most of the ride to the cabin. Juice stopped off at the store and grabbed some supplies, I stayed in the car.

When we arrived at the cabin it stank and was filthy. I got the cleaning products out and started cleaning, whilst Juice cooked us dinner.

" I love you, and we will get through this" Juice said as we got in bed.

"I love you too babe" I replied.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

I was sat at the desk at TM a few weeks later, sorting out the Repo's when a woman walked in.

"Is Jax about?" she asked.

"No they're on a blood drive" I said.

"oh that's our Jax alright, a model citizen" she said rolling her eyes.

"Is there something I can help you with?" I said standing up and crossing my arms.

"No, honey there isn't" she said sarcastically.

"well then I suggest you leave, darlin'" I smiled.

"you must be one of Jax's sweet buts" she said.

"No actually I'm an old lady, and who might you be?" I asked.

"well he definitely upgraded from Tara" she smirked "Just tell him Wendy called in"

"and what did Wendy, call in for?"

"Just tell him Wendy will be in touch" with that she flounced out of the office.

I didn't like her what so ever and I felt really angry, like I should run after her and beat the shit out of her.

I picked up my phone and went to call Juice, when Opie walked through the door.

"what did she want?" he asked.

"wanted to speak to Jax, got a real nasty attitude on her, that's for sure" I said.

"that's Wendy for you" he sighed.

"you know her?" I asked.

"yeah that's his ex wife, Abel's Mum" he replied.

"WHAT?" I asked shocked "I thought they were both Tara's"

"No, Wendy was a junkie she shot up whilst pregnant with Abel, she went into labor 10 weeks early, he almost died. What with his heart defect and born with his intestines and that outside his body, they gave him a 20 percent chance to live"

"Oh my god, I knew I didn't like that bitch" I said.

"you should call Jax and give him the heads up, and you should definitely call Gemma and Tara" she said.

I called Juice's phone, "hey babe!" he answered.

"hello, you okay?" I asked.

"yes, we just heading to the party now, I'll be seeing you tomorrow" he said

"any sweet butts?" I asked.

"none as sexy as my old lady, so don't you worry your pretty little head" he laughed.

"I ain't worried why have scabby beef burgers when you have steak at home" I laughed. But the truth was, I was worried, I hadn't long healed down there and I hadn't fancied sex at all. I didn't want him to stray but I couldn't bring myself to have sex with him, and he hadn't tried to.

"anyway it's Jax I wanted to speak to" I said.

"charming" he said, "hold on" I heard him call Jax and tell him it was me.

"hey darlin'" Jax said coming on the phone.

"I've just had a visitor at TM" I said "your ex wife Wendy"

"shit! What did she want?"

"she just said to tell you she asked after you" I said.

"Fuck sake, she's probably been clean for a few weeks and wants the mother of the year award" he said.

"Opie said I should give Tara and Gemma the heads up"

"If you could that would be great, you never know what this crank whore will do next" he said, "who's got the boy's?"

"Brooke at the house, Tara's at work and Gemma's out with Nero and his Son"

"Shit!, can you go over to the house and grab the boys, bring them and Brooke to TM, until one of them gets back?" he asked.

"Gemma's not coming back and Tara is on a sleep in, on call" I said.

"fuck sake!" he sighed.

"Don't worry, I'll stay over at yours with Brooke and bring them to TM in the morning till Gemma gets back"

"would you really?" he asked.

"course I would, you know I love those boys, anyway I better go she left a while ago now, she might be heading over there"

"Thanks babe" he said "I'll call you later, if anything happens call me straight away"

"will do, see you tomorrow" I said.

I hung up, grabbed the keys and went into the garage.

"I gotta go fetch the boys can you answer the phones while I'm out?" I asked Opie and the other guys.

"sure thing Liss" Opie winked. I jumped in the car and dialed Brookes number.

"hey!" she answered.

"Listen, I'm coming to grab the boys and you to bring you to TM, Don't answer the door to anyone, sort the bottles and anything they might need, I'll be there in a few" I said.

"why what's happening?" she asked.

"I'll tell you when I get there just please don't answer to anyone but me" I said.

"okay I won't" she said.

When I hung up I called Gemma and told her.

"shit!, I'll come back" she said.

"No don't worry I'm on way to get the boys and bring them to TM, I'll stay over tonight and bring them to TM in the morning until you or Tara get's home" I said.

"are you sure?" she asked.

"yeah I spoke to Jax and he agreed" I replied.

"You are a saint" she said, "any problems call me"

"will do!" I said. I hung up and called the hospital, Tara was in surgery so I left a message for her to call me.

I arrived at the house and called Brooke. "I'm here let me in" I said.

"good, someone was just knocking I was scared the baby was crying" she said.

"there's no one outside now, and I'm here now" I put the phone down. Brooke opened the door and I closed it behind me.

"You got everything ready?" I asked.

"almost, I'm just doing the bottles" she said.

I took the baby from her and put him in the car seat. I went and took Thomas in to the car and strapped him in. I went to the door to grab Abel's car seat and fitted it in the car. I went to the door and grabbed the baby bag, Abel came running down the hall and I took his hand. As we walked to the car, I heard someone call out to Abel. I turned around and saw Wendy stood there. "Abel baby" she said starting to get upset.

"who's that?, Auntie Liss?" he asked.

"don't worry about her just come on get in the car, and we will go get ice cream" I smiled.

"yayyyy!" he jumped up and down, and ran to the car.

"put him in Brooke will you?" I asked as she locked up.

I walked over to Wendy and got in her face "Listen here, you wait till Jax gets back to sort this shit out, but while he's away I'm under strict instructions to keep the crank whore away from Abel" I said in a hushed voice.

"You ain't his mom you can't stop me" she said.

" No I'm not his mother, but believe me sweet heart I can and I will stop you" I smirked "Now don't let me catch you within 15 ft of Abel again, I'll make sure you'll be sipping out of a straw in St Thomas's for the foreseeable future".

I walked back and jumped in the car along with Brooke and the kid's and headed back to TM.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

When we got back I sent one of the crow eaters to get Abel some Ice cream. While Abel was playing with Opie's kids on the climbing frame I called Jax.

"hey babe" he said.

"So I went over to get the boys and Wendy showed up,calling after Abel"

"the dirty junkie bitch" he said.

"I told her straight that if I catch her anywhere near Abel again I would make sure she was eating through a straw for awhile" I said.

He started laughing "you, babe are an absolute diamond" he said.

"well I will if I have to"

"I don't doubt that for a second" he said, " that's why I love you"

"anyway I got work to do, we're busy seeing as you all just fucked off and left us" I laughed.

"Okay darlin' thank you for everything, any problems call me" he said.

"will do" I said.

I worked my ass off for the rest of the day, with Thomas in the office with me, juggling feeds and diaper changes, with paper work and phone calls. Tara called and I explained the situation to her.

"I would try and get off work but we are up to our necks in it" she said.

"don't worry I got it covered" I said.

"thank you so much, I know they're safe with you" she said.

" No worries"

After work, Opie and I took the kids and Brooke to the diner for dinner, as I couldn't be bothered to cook and I needed to chill after the day I had. Juice called me to see how I was, you could tell he was wasted, "I love you I do" he said for the 7th time.

"I love you too babe, what you doing?" I asked.

"sat here with Kip enjoying the sun and the liquor" he laughed.

"as long as that's all you're enjoying" I said.

"of course" he said.

"miss you" I said.

"miss you too baby, I can't wait to see you"

"I gotta go, I need to get the kids bathed and ready for bed." I said.

"okay baby love you"

"love you too, you soppy shit" I laughed.

I dropped off Brooke at her house and headed back to Jax's. When I pulled up Unser was outside in his uniform.

"can I help you with something?" I asked getting out the car, walking round to get Thomas out the car.

"yeah we had a complaint from a Wendy Case saying you threatened her earlier" he said.

I started laughing "and how do you know it was me?"

"Your names sewn on your top" he pointed at my shirt.

"It wasn't a threat Wayne" I smirked.

"yeah I know, it was a promise" he said sarcastically.

"you listen to me, while everyone's out of town I'm in charge of these kids and I've been told to keep the smacked up bitch away from Abel, so that's what I'm going to do" I said.

"I here you, but I gotta look like I'm at least trying to do my job" he said.

"you mind?" I asked, holding the car seat to him. He took it from me and the changing bag, whilst I opened up the front door. I got Abel out as he had fallen asleep and carried him into the living room laying him on the sofa. I took Thomas from Unser and started to make the night feeds in the kitchen.

"so where's Tara?" he asked.

"working, Gemma's at the farm and Jax is on a run" I said.

"How you doing?" he asked.

"I'm doing better, not 100 percent but better" I smiled.

"good to hear it" he smiled, "you and Juice good?"

"yes but same not 100 percent" I sighed.

"you will get there"

"hopefully" I finished up the bottles and wiped down the kitchen counters.

"anyway I better get going, but can you please stop threatening people on my watch" he laughed. I locked the door behind him. I ran a bath for me. I slipped off my clothes and put on Tara's dressing gown. I got Abel undressed and put him to bed. I changed Thomas fed him his bottle , before getting in the bath. I relaxed for ages until the water was cold. I poured my self a glass of water to take to bed with me. I settled down with the book I had been reading about other women's experiences of domestic violence and rape. I hadn't had chance to read much of it as everyone had tried to keep me busy.

I read a few chapters and could barely keep my eyes open. Tara had texted to see how the kids were, so I replied before switching the lamp on. I had been asleep no longer than a few hours when Thomas woke up, I switched on the light and was startled to find Abel had climbed in bed with me. I smiled to myself before grabbing Thomas and putting his bottle onto warm. After I fed him I put him in bed with Abel and I.

We didn't wake up until my alarm went off. I made up a bottle for Thomas and made breakfast for Abel and Brooke who arrived shortly after she got the kids ready while I got dressed and we headed over to TM.

I opened up the office and checked the messages. Opie arrived and handed me a bunch of tulips, "what are those for?" I asked looking confused.

"I thought would cheer the place up a bit, and I think you deserve a little gift" he winked.

"aww thanks Ope" I said giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"they ain't much"

"they are very thoughtful, and I love tulips" I said. I got Brooke to get me a vase of water and I put them on my desk before work.

At lunch time I ordered a delivery from the Deli for Brooke, Opie, Abel and I. We all sat at the benches in the sunshine, I fed Thomas too.

"this is nice" Brooke said.

"really nice" I smiled "make the most of it because Gemma will be back soon"

Opie laughed.

Sure enough a few hours later Gemma came and relieved us of baby sitting duties.

I told her about the little visit we had from Wendy, "she is a liability" Gemma sighed.

That evening I went back to the apartment, made dinner for Juice and I.

I had a shower, washed and dried my hair making a bit of an effort for my man. I heard is bike pull up, I was that excited I ran out the front door, down the stairs flinging my arms and legs around his waist.

"there's my baby" he kissed me, "you look amazing"

"come on I made dinner" I said, he carried me up the stairs and I found it hilarious.

We sat an ate dinner, while chatting about how our last few days had gone. Juice's story's of Kip wasted made me laugh hard.

"I wanted to talk to you about something" Juice sai

"should I be worried?" I sighed.

"no you fool I didn't even so much as get a hand job while I was away, what I wanted to talk to you about is tattoos" he said

"what tattoo's?" I asked.

"well now you're an old lady, you need the old lady tattoo" he said.

"oh, I dunno Juice we've only been seeing each other a few months" I said.

"well you may as well call it 4 because, you were in love with me from the day you lay eyes on me" he laughed. I couldn't help but smile.

"so this tattoo?" he asked. I walked over and sat on his lap, "what ever makes you happy" I said kissing him.

"well I kinda got one last night" he laughed.

"wasted was you?" I laughed

"just a little but I don't regret it" he said unbuttoning his shirt. On his ribs he had had Alissa and a heart next to it.

"that is the soppiest shit I've ever seen,but I love it" I laughed and kissed him.

"so what you say about you getting it done?" he asked.

"I'll think about it" I laughed. I straddled him on the chair and kissed him passionately.

"lets go to bed!" I said wrapping my arms around his neck and kissed him.

"are you sure?" he asked.

"positive" I smiled. He picked me up and walked me to the bed room.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"is it going to hurt? There though?" I asked Happy as he put the transfer on my wrist. I had only got a small tattoo on the top of my back I had done when I was 18.

"I ain't going to lie it hurts, but there is worse places" he laughed.

"the things you do for love" I said rolling my eyes.

It was a week after Juice had first mentioned the tattoo and after much thought I had decided to get it done. It wasn't the best looking tattoo a crow with a heart and the words forever in a scroll. What the crow carried varied, I had decided on a dagger.

That night was Kip and Rat boy's patching in party, it was supposed to be the party of all party's.

"you coming to the patch party?" Happy asked, trying to keep my mind off the pain.

"I doubt it, not now I'm an old lady anyway" I said.

"you have to come" Kip said checking out his tattoo in the mirror.

"why?" I asked.

"because it's my patch party" he laughed.

"she is coming" Juice said.

"we will see" I replied.

That night, I was in two minds about the party, I got half ready and then decided not to go.

"if you change your mind call me" Juice said kissing me.

"I doubt it you have a good time and I'll see you when you get back" I said kissing him goodbye.

I sat watching TV for ages, before I decided I would go. My hair and make up were already done so all I needed to do was get dressed. I decided on my ripped jeans,a vest with a skull on it and a leather waterfall jacket. I wore my black stilettos and accessorized with gold jewelry. Just as I was leaving there was a knock at the door. I looked through the peephole, it was Kip. I opened the door "what are you doing here?" I asked.

"I came to make you come to the party" he said.

"I was coming anyway" I laughed.

"well now I'm making sure" he grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. He handed me a helmet.

"how wasted are you right now?" I asked.

"pretty bad" he laughed.

"I'll drive" I said.

"No lets walk" he smiled " I'll push the bike, its only 4 blocks away" he said.

I agreed and we started to walk, "you look really beautiful" he said.

"awww, thanks kip" I said.

"you always look beautiful" he smiled.

"don't let Cherry hear you say that, she already hates me" I giggled.

"fuck her I'm sick of her" he replied.

"why what happened?" I asked.

"I don't know, she's changed or ,maybe it's me" he said shaking his head.

"whats that supposed to mean, she's your old lady now" I said.

"I don't know, my heads messed up" he said.

We got to the club house and outside were loads of people out the front including Cherry with her arms folded glaring at us both, she stormed off inside.

"think we're in trouble" I laughed.

"let's get a drink, forget about it" he smiled.

I said hello to the guys as I walked through. When I got inside Cherry was ranting to Juice, when Juice looked up and saw me he smiled, getting up and walking towards me.

"what was she ranting about?" I asked, after he kissed me.

"just ignore her, on one because she blames you for what happened to Kip" he sighed.

"really? So this is why she keeps giving me evils and rolling her eyes at me?" I sighed.

"plus she thinks there's something going on with you two" he laughed.

"what you mean?" I asked.

"thinks the two of you are having an affair"

"is she being serious?" I said.

"don't worry, I know nothings going on" he laughed.

"I'm going to punch her in the god damn face" I said.

"don't worry about it, its pointless drama" he said.

"It's not though is it really, because what if people believed her?" I asked. I flung open the bathroom door and marched out.

Cherry was stood with her back to me, drinking at the bar. I grabbed her by the hair and pulled her backwards.

"what the fuck?" she screamed. She spun around to look at me, and I sucker punched her in the face.

Everyone stopped and stared, Cherry was on the floor with blood pouring out her nose.

"don't you EVER CHAT SHIT ABOUT ME AGAIN!" I said.

"come on now" Juice said grabbing my arm and pulling me away.

"you're a fucking PHSYCO" she said as I was by the door.

"Is that right?" I asked, turning back around and going for her again. Juice grabbed me and picked me up. I was kicking and screaming until I got outside.

"come on lets go home" Juice said.

"No way, I'm going to kill this silly bitch" I said.

"you made your point, now come on take your anger out on me in bed when we got home" he laughed.

I tried to act stubborn but I couldn't around Juice, and started smiling.

We went home and started ripping each others clothes off before we made it to the front door.

At 3am I was awoken to the sound of glass being smashed. Juice jumped up grabbing his gun, "stay here!" he said, but of course me being me threw on a shirt and followed him with a baseball bat. Once he checked everywhere he switched the light on in the living room to see someone had bricked the living room window with a rock.

Before anything was even said, I marched into the bedroom throwing on my clothes and taking the baseball bat with me.

"what the fuck are you doing?" Juice asked.

"Don't follow me I'm sorting this NOW!" I grabbed my car keys and ran down the stairs. Juice was calling after me, but I ignored him and sped off, first stop was the club house. Jax was stood outside, he came walking over to the car, "Is Cherry in there?" I asked.

"No she left not long after you and Juice" he said.

"you sure?"

"100 percent, why?" he said. I didn't reply I just swung the car round on the lot and sped off. I drove to her and Kips apartment, her car was there so I banged the door down, no one answered so I proceeded to smash her car up.

Just as I was knocking the wing mirrors off there was a rumble of motorbikes and up pulled, Jax, Chibs and Juice.

"what the fucking hell?" Jax said started laughing.

"how do you even know it was her?" Juice asked.

"listen 100 percent its her, who else as got a grudge with any of us that could be that petty?" I asked.

"yeah, come off it Juice it blatantly is" Chibs laughed.

"don't start her!, for god sake" Juice said, "come on lets go home" he said.

"Oh no I'm not finished yet" I smirked, before taking the last wing mirror off and smashing the last head light" I walked casual as you like back to my car and drove off.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

I got home marched up the stairs and started to clean up the glass that covered the living room, I was utterly furious.

Juice walked through the door with a face like thunder "you do know I'm going to end up having to pay for the car"

"erm NO!, I don't think so this little slut can fuck right off, I've got to pay for a new fucking window and get someone to come asap or we are going to get robbed" I said.

"you don't know for sure that it was her" he said.

"oh come off it Juice it was blatantly that little bitch" I said.

"how could you know?" he asked.

"woman's intuition" I said rolling my eyes. I called out and emergency window repair man and waited up whilst Juice went to sleep.

I finally got to sleep at quarter to 6, I wasn't asleep for long when Juice's phone went off.

"I have to go" he said.

"what for now?" I asked.

"club business" he replied as he pulled on his jeans. I looked at the clock it was ten past 8.

"at this time?" I asked rolling my eyes.

"yes at this time" he said with a tone of annoyance in his voice, so I decided not to press him further. I turned over and closed my eyes. He left shortly after without saying goodbye or kissing my brow and ruffling my hair like he usually did. I fell back to sleep and was woken again by my phone at 9, it was Kip I groaned and answered it "Hello!"

"well you did a right one on Cherry's car" he said, but surprisingly didn't sound mad. "let alone her face"

"well you know she can't be going round telling people I'm after you and then bricking my windows" I said.

"yeah I know do you want the money for that?" he asked.

"so she admitted it then?, because Juice seems to think its not" I said.

"no she told me when I asked but she didn't say why you had hit her" he replied.

"well no the windows paid for and I'm damn sure the cars going to cost more than my window" I laughed, "and you are a total mug if you pay for it"

"well I'm not paying for the car because I've kicked her out"

"what?" I asked.

"today was the final straw, I'm still pissed and I have her ranting and raving at me about you"he said.

"don't use me as an excuse you weren't happy anyway"

"I'm not using you as an excuse I'm telling you that it was the final straw, you are a good friend to me Hoes before Bro's" he laughed.

"well it's just going to end up making my life a thousand times worse" I sighed.

"how is it?" I asked.

"because, Juice has already been a prick to me, he didn't even kiss me or say goodbye when he went out this morning" I said.

"he's gone out already?, it's Sunday" he asked.

"club stuff" I said.

"what club stuff?, Jax has popped to the Cabin for some alone time with Tara"

"are you shitting me?" I asked.

"yeah and everyone's too hung over to do anything to day"he replied.

"RIGHT!" I said "I'll call you later"

I put the phone down and called Juice, but he didn't answer, I started to get really mad and texted Kip asking what time he kicked Cherry out and he said around 7:30 am because he was still at the club house and she had called him ranting.

I knew in my heart of hearts he had gone to help her move out, so I got dressed and jumped in the car. As I drove passed Kips house the van from TM was there. I pulled up like a woman possessed and got out the car, my heart was racing and I thought I'm going to walk in here and see them at it. I got to the top of the stairs and the door was open. I heard them talking just then Juice came out carrying a box. He looked up and saw me, his jaw dropped to the floor. I thought I would kick off but I didn't, I looked at him in disgust and walked out.

"Alissa wait let me explain" he called after me. I walked back to the car, with him still shouting my name. I got in the car and sped off, bursting into tears as soon as I was out of sight.

My phone started to ring, it was Juice so I canceled the call then switched the phone off. I went back to the apartment grabbing a handful of clothes, my make up and threw it all in a case, along with shoes and toiletries. I grabbed my purse and headed back out to the car. I posted my keys and got in the car, and sped off. I didn't know where I was going just knew I had to get as far away from Charming as I possibly could. I drove for a long time around in circles, I ended up in Stockton where I booked into a motel. I collapsed on the bed and switched my phone on, I had 8 voice notes and lots of text messages mainly from Juice. They all said that he was sorry and that he had spoken to Kip and he now knew that she had smashed the window and he was sorry he didn't believe me.

I lay down and nodded off, I awoke to the sound of the motel door being kicked off, I was grabbed by 3 men in masks, Just before they put a cloth bag over my head I saw that the one had a swastik tattoo on his chest, I only saw it because his shirt button was open. I was hit over the head with something heavy which knocked me out. When I woke I was hanging from a chain in what I could tell was a warehouse but it was dark. I began screaming for someone to help me making as much of a noise as I possibly could. I heard a noise in the distance so I carried on screaming, the door opened and for a split second I thought I'd been found, until I saw the masks.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

"tell your beloved Samcro to stop selling guns to the niggers and the wet backs, if they continue to do so we will find you and we will do this again maybe even kill you" the main one said after all 3 of them had raped me. I was numbed I didn't feel upset or anger I felt nothing. They didn't cut me down they left me hanging there with my trousers round my ankles just swinging there.

I cried until I couldn't cry no more, which seemed like hours. I heard a noise from outside again, I didn't shout this time, I thought it was them again until I heard someone call my name.

"help!" I managed, but it was a quiet croak as my mouth was so dry.

I heard gun shots and in burst Unser, he came running to me quickly pulling my trousers up to cover my modesty, before freeing me. I collapsed in a heap on the floor, Unser went to radio it in before I stopped him.

"please don't, I can't go through all this again" I said.

So he told them it was a false alarm and that it was probably just kids messing around.

"we need to get you to the hospital" Unser said.

"No, I don't want anyone to know I don't want to go back to Charming" I cried.

"Liss, you are in Charming, what happened to you?"

"how did you know it was me?" I asked.

"Your cars out front"

"Is it? I was kidnapped from a motel in Stockton, they must have bought my car" I said looking confused.

" what did they say exactly?"

"they threatened Samcro" I replied.

"you need to tell Jax"

"No I don't" I said.

"Alissa you at least have to go to the hospital, do me this one thing please" he said.

"can I just see Tara, I don't want anyone to know not that this has happened to me again" I said.

So I ended up in a private room with Tara, I had to have swabs, tests and antibiotics again. I couldn't believe that this had happened to me again, and I didn't even have Juice to take care of me because he was shacked up with the bitch.

I lay in the dark feeling like what was the point in my life when the door opened, and in walked Juice.

"what happened?" he asked rushing to my side.

I didn't even have the energy to speak to him, "please just leave me alone" I muttered.

"Alissa, please just tell me what happened?" he asked.

"Like I said just leave me alone" I said.

"look I'm sorry for what I did, I didn't believe you and I'm sorry, I swear I didn't do anything and now I know If I see her again I'll bitch slap her myself"

"I can't deal with this right now" I said "Just leave"

"No, Listen to me please" he sobbed.

"LISTEN?" I screamed "I WAS JUST FUCKING GANG RAPED BECAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR FUCKING CLUB" I was up out of the bed now and the pain was horrendous.

"what?" he asked looking taken aback.

"yeah told me this was to teach you lot a fucking lesson, for selling weapons to the Niggers and the Wet backs" I said trying my best not to scream, "and that's on you and your club, yeah I knew you weren't saints but this?, you didn't even warn me this could happen?"

"I didn't know this happened, we got no beef with no one, who were they?"

"how the fuck should I know? They were wearing masks"

"you gotta tell me everything you know" he said.

"I'd sooner talk to someone else right now" I said.

"don't be like that babe"

"get someone else I'm done with you, nothing but trouble since I got here, I should of left as soon as my car was fixed. At least I wouldn't be heart broken right now" I started to cry.

He went to hug me, but I pulled away from him. "leave me alone!" I screamed. He had tears in his eyes before he walked out.

20 minutes later Jax arrived, he looked genuinely upset.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, I didn't know anything like this would happen, we got no beefs with no one" he said.

"well obviously someone doesn't like you selling guns to the ethnic minority, the guy had a Nazi symbol tattooed on his chest, It wasn't that guy you had beef with before the white supremacist? I know his voice and none of them were him I can assure you" I said.

I proceeded to tell him all what had happened and what they had said. He kissed my brow before leaving, as he got to the door he turned back. "don't push Juice away, you need him and he needs you, you were made for each other. Yeah maybe he messed up but everyone deserves a second chance" he smiled in a sympathetic way.

I sighed, rolled over and closed my eyes, falling into a deep sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

I woke up to Tara coming in saying that I was being discharged and was there someone that could bring me home.

"what home?" I said rolling my eyes.

"well Juice is outside"she said.

"why did you tell him?" I asked.

"because you need somewhere to go and that is your home" she smiled.

"WAS, my home"

I went to the bathroom and slammed the door behind me. I had a wash and got dressed, when I went back into the room Tara was still there she had a bag of pills for me.

"Yes I know the drill, antibiotics one three times a day with food and painkillers as and when I need them" I cut in before she had chance to speak.

"and the counseling?" she asked.

"what so they can tell me that its not my fault?, Well there seems to be an attraction to men for them to RAPE ME!" I shouted.

"well it isn't your fault, its just one of them things" she said.

"OH YEAH SURE, it happens to everyone doesn't it?" I said getting hysterical " Maybe it will be third time lucky and I'll get Aids or die"

"don't talk like that" she said.

"well it's true or Pregnant by a rapist?"

"you have had the morning after pill" she said rolling her eyes.

I stuffed everything in my bag and stormed out, Juice was sat on the chair, he stood up when he saw me and I slammed the bag into his hand.

He stood in shock as I marched down the hall "well are you taking me home OR WHAT?!" I shouted.

He came running up beside me, he tried to grab my hand and I pulled it away sharply.

"No, Juice definitely not!" I scolded.

"babe please can you just stop?"

"No I can't not after what you did I can't just switch off and especially after what happened to me last night because of your club" I said.

"I'm truly sorry and we will deal with it, I promise you" He said.

"dealing with it don't mean shit, It already happened to me and you can't change that" I said. We had gotten to my car and I was waiting for him to open the door.

"will you ever forgive me?" he asked grabbing my hand.

"I've forgiven you already, but I ain't forgetting that easily" I replied.

"I truly am sorry Alissa, I was jealous and when I'm jealous I get irrational, I just want to love you" he said.

"I know babe, but now's not the time." I said.

We got in the car and drove home, I had a shower and got in my Pj's. Juice made me something to eat but I didn't eat much, I lay on the sofa with the TV on but I wasn't really watching it.

Juice had a phone call "I've gotta go" he said.

"yeah okay" I muttered.

"do you need someone to stay with you?" he asked.

"No last time that happened, 2 people nearly died" I said.

"Alissa" he said bending down and grabbing my hand, "please, stop this we have got through this once we can do it again. Lets go to the cabin for a few day's sort us out again and then you can start healing"

"I don't want to, I don't need healing I'm fine"

"you're not fine you haven't got to pretend to me" he said.

The next few days I did nothing but lay in my Pj's, I didn't eat, all I did was shower, take Valium's and slept.

People came to see me and I refused to see them, I heard Juice whispering on the phone to Tara saying that he was worried and thought that they needed to have me admitted to a psychiatric unit, as I was obviously having a nervous breakdown.

Maybe I was, I had lost all my get up and go I didn't feel anything for anyone let alone myself. I opened the bedroom door.

"I do need help you're right, but I don't want to go to no hospital, I'll see a counselor and we can go to the cabin for awhile" I said.

"I'm sorry if you feel like we're ganging up on you" Juice said.

"I know, but you are right, I'll go and see someone as soon as I can get in" I sighed.

"I want my Alissa back" he said pulling a sad face.

"I miss her too" I said.

"I'll call Tara and see what we can do and then we can go to the cabin for a while till you're feeling better" he smiled.

"I think it will be more than a while" I huffed.

"If it takes a year then it takes a year" he said. I grabbed his hand and interlocked my fingers with his.

"I've missed you" he said.

"thank you" I smiled.

"for what?" he asked.

"for being patient with me, and giving me a reason to live" I said.

"you're the reason I live babe, I will never let anyone ever hurt you again, I know I said that last time but you did do a runner on me" he smiled.

"never again will I leave you"

So over the next few days we packed up our things, which kept me busy and my mind off things, and went to my first meeting. I really opened up to her, which surprised me and even after just an hour I felt a million times better. She gave me a card with a number for a support group in Charming at the church, I called them they told me the meeting days and I could come along anytime. So Juice and I decided to head to the cabin and then I would travel back for a meeting while Juice did some things for the club. I took the car up and Juice followed on his bike. Gemma and Jax had been absolutely amazing with us both.

I did my usual spring clean of the cabin whilst Juice did the fire wood. Juice and I had a lovely meal that we both prepared. I let my heart out to Juice and he held me until I stopped crying.

We hashed out all our problems over the next few days and we were as strong as we had ever been.


	11. Chapter 11

It took a few weeks before I was able to go back to work after my ordeal. The support groups and counselling had helped me loads and I was finally learning to love myself again after all this trauma I had been through.

I was at work one morning when Juice came in with a big grin on his face.

"What's up with you?" I grinned.

"Well, I'm just happy to see you smiling baby" he said, leaning over the desk and kissing me on the lips.

"There is clearly something going on" I said rolling my eyes.

"Well, you and I we have the weekend off" He said.

"How have you managed that?" I asked.

"Because, I wanted to take you away for a few days, no one just us" he replied.

"The cabin?" I asked rolling my eyes.

"No not the cabin" he grinned.

"I know what will happen, we will get there and then there will be some club business you have to attend to. Or it's in a place where there is a charter and you have to do something there" I replied.

"No my cuts staying here and so is my bike" he smiled.

"So come on then where is this wonderful place you are taking me?" I asked.

"Can a man not have any secrets?" he asked.

"Well clearly not" I said rolling my eyes.

"All you need to do is pack some clothes. Gemma's on her way so you can go home and pack" he said.

"What? we're going tonight?"

"Yes our check in is at 7.30 so we are leaving at 5" he said.

"I can't believe you have gone to all this trouble" I smiled.

Just then Gemma came through the door, "I'm here, I'm here don't panic" she laughed.

"I'm still in total shock to what the hell is going on" I said.

"Liss just get your ass to the apartment and get yourself ready" Juice said.

"Ok I'm going" I said picking my keys and bag up.

Juice gave me a kiss and Gemma gave me a hug.

"You have a nice break, you deserve it" she said.

I got home threw my bag on the bed and sat staring at my wardrobe contemplating what to wear.

I eventually packed my bag and went in the shower. As I was drying my hair my phone began to ring.

"Hello!" I answered.

"Liss are you ready?" Juice asked.

"What the hell, I'm just drying my hair. You said we weren't leaving till 5 its only 3.15" I said a bit too sternly.

"I know that but I just wondered if you were dressed because there's a surprise outside for you" He said.

"I'm in my bootie shorts and vest, what are you on about?" I asked.

"Just come outside please" he replied.

"Give me a few minutes please babe" I replied.

I put my slippers on and threw a hoodie on.

I flung open the front door and looked over the side to see Juice stood there with a Dodge Durango with a big bow on the front. "What the fucking hell is that?" I asked. "Well your car is a piece of shit and I wanted to treat you" he smiled. "Why would you do that?" I asked. "Because I love you, you absolute knob" he laughed. I walked down the stairs and ran my hand over the hood of the car. "I know it's not brand new but its only 2 years old been checked over by me and I got you the good alloys" He added. "You are just the sweetest" I said, I jumped up wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. "Don't put my back out" He laughed. "Shut your face" I said kissing him on the lips. "Do you like it?" he asked. "Course I do" I smiled. "Now get your butt back upstairs and get yourself ready, you can come and pick me up from TM" He said. "What about your packing?" I asked. "I did that yesterday" he smiled. "Make sure that you pack something really fancy" he said. "Juju you don't do fancy" I said rolling my eyes. "Well I am this weekend" he said. "How fancy?" I asked. "As fancy as you have" he said. "Well I don't really have really fancy, I will have to work something out" I sighed. So I went back upstairs to finish getting ready. After I had finished my hair and makeup I went through all of my clothes. I decided to look through my old clothes, that Juice had gotten me from my old house. My ex husband had showered me with expensive clothes every time he hit me to try and pretend he still loved me, so I had plenty. I found a dress that he had bought just before I left him. It was a floor length navy jewelled backless fishtailed dress. I had actually picked it myself knowing full well I would never be allowed to wear it but I would just try it on every time he was out. I found out some heels to go with it and packed them in my bag. At ten to five I put my bag and dress into my new car. I set the seat up and plugged my phone in to the system to play all my favourite songs. I drove over to TM with the biggest grin on my face. When I pulled on to the forecourt everyone stopped and starred at me. I pulled up to the lads who were just shutting up shop and they all grinned at me. "Well, well, well! Don't we look good in the new car" Chib's said. "Isn't it beautiful" I smiled. "It sure is Lissie" he smiled. "Will you just look at Lissie in her new ride" Jax said walking over, "Do you like it?" "I love it" I smiled. "Good it's about time you got rid of that piece of crap" He laughed. "So where's Juice?" I asked. "He's just getting washed up and he will be out" Jax replied. "Thank you for giving us both some time off" I smiled. "No problem, you deserve it" he winked. "I can't believe he's gone to all this trouble" I said. "He loves you that's why" Chib's smiled. Just then Juice came walking out. He had been growing his hair for a while and he had had a cut that was still short but you couldn't see his tattoo's. He had a long sleeve t-shirt on, jeans and a pair of shoes. He looked like a normal guy, not a bad ass biker. It was really strange but I kind of liked it. He threw his bag in the back, said bye to everyone and jumped in next to me. "You look lovely" He smiled. "Thanks babe" I smiled. We said goodbye and drove out of Charming. "You like the car?" He asked. "Love it babe, thank you so much" I said. "It's not a problem, I like it when you smile, and today is the first time I've seen it in a long time" he said. "And it's all because of you" I said. He put the Sat Nav on and I followed it having no clue where we were going. We sang along to the music and had a right laugh all the way. It was so nice just to be alone like a normal couple, which wasn't something we got to do. When we finally arrived it was in Carmel and was the cutest little bed and breakfast I had ever seen. By the sea but still very remote. Juice checked us in under his real name and with a card. I had never in my life seen Juice with a card he only ever dealt with cash. "Breakfast is at 7.30 until 10.30" The manager said, "We do have a pool and every suite has its own hot tub and we request you to keep the noise down after 11 pm". Juice carried our bags to the suite. It was beautiful, the bathroom had an amazing shower and bath, the living area had a huge TV and a massive corner sofa and the bed was huge. "This is so beautiful babe" I said. "I know I could get used to this" He smiled. We got washed up and went for a walk to get food. Juice held my hand as we walked. "This is nice" he smiled, "It's not very often we get to do this" "I know we do seriously need to make time for each other. Maybe once a month we have a date night, get out of charming" I said. "I'm down for that" he smiled. We had a lovely meal and headed back to the hotel. I hadn't bought a bathing suit so I went in the hot tub in my bra and pants. "I've never seen you look as beautiful as you do right now" he said grabbing my hand pulling me close to him. "Is it because I'm half naked?" I asked. "No you just seem so happy and you're finally smiling after all what has happened" he replied. "Well it's only because of you babe" I smiled. "I know it's only been 5 months but we have been through a lot. Mostly bad times but I would sooner the rest of my life be a bad time as long as I shared it with you" He smiled. "Oh check you out!" I laughed. "Why do you always have to make a joke of it?" he exhaled loudly and rolled his eyes. "I'm not, you know I love you" I replied. "It's like you're too scared to get too close to me" He sighed. "How is that possible? I asked, "I loved you since the day I lay eyes on you. I could have easily topped myself after all this but the reason I haven't is because of you. You make me happier than I could ever be, just because I don't show it very often doesn't mean I don't" Juice didn't say anything he just pulled me onto his lap and kissed me. We sat kissing for ages and it all got a bit raunchy. I stood up and grabbed his hand, "come on" I smirked. Juice looked up at me "Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked. "Yes it's time, I can't have you running off with another woman" I laughed. "That will never happen" he frowned "If you're not ready then don't do it to please me" "No I have my mojo back" I winked. I walked off UN hooking my bra, flinging it off and wrapping a towel round me. "Oh Liss what the hell are you doing to me?" He smiled. "Well come on and find out" I said walking in to suite. 


	12. Chapter 12

The following morning I woke up naked with my head on Juice's chest. I had actually woken up smiling for the first time in ages. I got up and had a shower and washed my hair. Even though Juice had been really gentle when we made love I was still a little sore down there.

I dried my hair and left it down ready to style later before putting a little makeup on. I wore skinny jeans and a vest top. Juice woke up and quickly jumped in the shower, and then we headed down for breakfast. We held hands and kept kissing each other through breakfast. I had never known a relationship to be like this, even with my now dead ex husband. When we first got together it was never like this, I always felt like I had to watch what I said and did even before the beatings.

Juice was acting really strange, he seemed nervous like something was happening. So when we went back to the suite I challenged him about it.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You're acting all shifty" I said.

"What are you on about?" he said looking flustered.

"You here on some club business?" I asked.

"No are you crazy? He said giving me a funny look.

"Well what is your problem?" I asked.

"I don't have one" he smiled.

I let it go and we had a lovely day, walking on the beach getting our tan on. We had ice cream sitting on the sand.

"So we going to head back? Get ready for tonight" Juice said.

"Is this when I have to dress fancy?" I asked.

"Yes it is" he smiled.

"Come on then because you know how long it takes me" I laughed.

"Yes babe I do" he smiled.

So we headed back to the bed and breakfast. I put my hair in rollers and had a bath, whilst Juice slept.

He woke up as I was finishing my makeup.

"Will you be ready once I've had a shower and got changed?" he asked.

"Yeah I only have to do my hair and get dressed" I smiled.

I did my hair very old Hollywood glamour and I felt a million dollars already.

I went in the bedroom to get ready, whilst Juice got ready in the bathroom. I slipped the dress on, but I couldn't zip it up.

"Juicy, could you zip me up?" I shouted.

"Yeah babe 2 seconds" he replied.

I put my heels on whilst I waited, with my fake diamond earrings and my fake diamond bracelet.

When Juice walked in my back was to him and he zipped me up straight away. When I turned round he was in a full black tux with a white shirt and black tie.

"Oh my god" I smiled. Juice just stared at me without saying a word.

"What do I look like shit?" I asked.

"Hell no you look stunning absolutely breath taking" he said.

"Oh shut up" I said rolling my eyes.

"Why can't you just take a compliment you?" he asked.

"I don't know" I laughed. He grabbed my hand and kissed it.

"Can you please just be confident, you are stunning and I am the luckiest man alive to be with you" he said.

"And I am the luckiest girl, you look so hot right now" I said.

"I know right" he laughed.

"Let's just stay here and get take out" I asked.

"We can't be dressed like this and stay in" he said rolling his eyes.

So we went to the restaurant in a cab. It was on the sea front and it was beautiful. The waiter showed us to a table which was actually on the beach, so I slipped my heels off and walked bare foot.

We ordered our drinks as we looked at the menu.

"What's the budget because it's all a bit pricey" I said.

"You can have what you want babe" he smiled.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Of course this whole things for you so honestly have what you want" he smiled.

"Well alright then" I grinned.

I ordered the steak with a walnut and blue cheese salad and I felt very fancy.

We sat eating and chatting away watching the waves roll in.

"This is the most romantic date I have ever been on" I said.

"This is the most romantic things I've ever done" he laughed. After we had eaten Juice and I went for a walk along the beach, it was so beautiful that I felt very emotional when we sat down I put my head on Juice's shoulder.

"I've had an amazing time" He said grabbing my hand.

"Me too babe, I don't want to go home" I said.

"Me either" he sighed.

"Can we stay here a while? Here on the beach I mean" I asked.

"You can stay here as long as you want" He smiled.

We didn't speak for a while we just watched the sea and the stars.

"There was a reason that I bought you here" Juice said breaking the silence.

"What's that?" I asked looking confused.

"Can you stand up I want to show you something?" he asked.

"Yeah sure" I said standing up.

Juice stood up and grabbed my hands.

"I know it's not been long but the things we have been through it feels like I've known you all my life. And despite what we have been through I love you so much and I've never felt this way in my life, I've never even had a steady girlfriend because I couldn't be bothered with all the crap but with you it's different. I honest love you so much and I can see me spending my life with you" He said.

"Aww babe that's so sweet" I said.

"So I'm going out on a limb here Alissa but" he said, taking something out of his pocket and getting down on one knee.

"Oh my God" I said clasping my hands to my mouth.

He opened a jewellery box and inside was the most beautiful rose gold pink and white diamond ring.

"Alissa the love of my life will you do the honour of being my wife?" he asked. He looked so nervous and he was shaking. I at this point was crying my eyes out. I bent down and grabbed his face. "Of course I will marry you" I said kissing him on the lips over and over. He began grinning and wiped his eyes.

"I can't believe I was so stressed out about this thinking that you would say no" he said.

"Never I would, never say no to you" I said wiping under my eyes.

"Can I put the ring on you now?" he asked.

"get it on" I grinned.

He slid it on my finger and it was beautiful. It wasn't massive but it was big, bigger than I ever expected to ever have on my finger.

"I absolutely love this ring" I smiled.

"I'm glad it cost me a fortune" he said.

"I would have been happy with a cheap one baby, you have spent an absolute fortune on me" I said.

"You are worth I Liss, I mean it will be a while until we can afford the wedding" He laughed.

"I don't care how long it takes babe" I said, "Plus we can save together now"

That night was the most amazing, we didn't have sex because I was still a little sore, but we sat and cuddled talking laughing and getting drunk till the early hours. We checked out the following morning after breakfast.

We had a lovely drive back it was such a beautiful day and I was so happy that my jaw ached from smiling.

When we arrived back home Juice made me get dressed to go to the club house.

"Can't you just go back tomorrow? Let's just stay here" I said.

"No come on we will just pop for a drink and tell everyone the good news" he replied.

"You are a nightmare" I said rolling my eyes.

"Stop moaning and come on" he laughed.

I quickly freshened up my makeup and got changed, into jeans and thigh high boots with an off the shoulder top and choker.

Juice put his cut back on and we took his bike to the club house. I was a little confused as to why there were so many bikes there. Juice grabbed my hand and as we walked in I got why there were so many bikes.

The whole room erupted with "CONGRATULATIONS!" I almost jumped out of my skin. There was a huge banner that said happy engagement Juice & Alissa and decorations everywhere. All our close friends were there and some of the guys from other charters that Juice got on with.

Lyla came over and hugged me saying congratulations then grabbed my hand looking at my ring.

"That is the most gorgeous ring I have ever seen" she gushed.

"I know right? The boy did good." I said looking at Juice.

We circled the room and everyone gave us their well wishes. The drinking and partying began and just a couple of hours into the party I was very tipsy. I finally caught up with Juice and he grabbed my hand.

"Come on outside I want to show you something" He said.

"Not another gift?" I asked.

"No nothing like that" He laughed.

I followed him outside and over to the swings on the play area.

"It was just getting a bit much in there" he said.

"I can't believe they were in on it this whole time and made all this effort for us" I smiled.

"They love you that's why" he grinned.

"I love it here I'm so glad that you made me stay" I said.

"Now it's just you and me babe against the world" he said

"I do love you" I said reaching for his hand. He took it and kissed it, "I love you too babe"


End file.
